Most people remember when they were wee little kids and liked to ask adults ‘why.’ A lot. I think it starts with a young child’s innate curiosity. At first, a parent or adult attempts to satisfy that curiosity by answering the ‘why’ question. But we all know what inevitably comes after providing the answer.
Yep. Another “Why?”
We may attempt to answer that one, but we already know the whole ‘why’ thing has slipped into a vicious cycle.
For example:
Small child: “Daddy, why do you go cut firewood?”
Dad: “So we’ll have it to burn in the stove.”
Small child: “Why do we burn it in the stove?”
Dad: “So it will heat the house.”
Small child: “Why do we need to heat the house?”
Dad: “So we can be warm in the winter.”
Small child (now starting to turn into an irritant): “Why can’t we burn something else to stay warm?”
Dad (now starting to become irritated): “Because wood works best.”
Small child: “Why?”
Dad: “Because it burns hotter and cleaner.”
Small child: “Why?”
Dad – now through clinched teeth: “Because I say so.”
Small child: “Why?”
Dad: “Because I said so, now shut up with the ‘why’ business and go play with your toys.”
Small child: “Why?”
Soon, the child, however small, discovers that the ‘why’ question is a hot button, just so long as they keep hitting that button over and over again. Soon, the adult doesn’t want that hot button hit, so they go into the “Because I said so” mode much more quickly. I’ve seen parents whose child has hit the ‘why’ button so many times they literally yell, “Because I said so. Now don’t ever, ever, EVER ask me why again.” Some simply dismiss the “Why” question by firing back with “Why not?” This is akin to the age old “I know you are, but what am I?” argument.
These responses are the first death knell of the question “Why.”
Kids move on into school where they often run into the same thing. They are experiencing new things, new people, new concepts and ideas and they naturally ask “Why?”
Often, the same cycle of ‘why’ that happened at home is repeated in elementary school. As the child grows the question of ‘why’ becomes less and less welcome. Eventually, the child will ask it of a teacher who either is insecure in what they do or simply doesn’t know the answer. That teacher becomes angry about the ‘why’ thing and the student now has a teacher keeping a close eye on the potential trouble maker. Some teachers will obliquely punish a student for hitting them with the ‘why.’
Teacher: “That’s a good question and a great topic for a short essay. Everyone, your homework for the evening is to research and answer that question in a two page paper due tomorrow.” Students groan and glare at the ‘why’ student.
Sometimes ‘why’ can be unsafe or even dangerous.
Many teachers in our educational system don’t like the ‘why’ question for another reason: ‘Why’ questions are hard work.
What, when, where, who, how are easily asked by a teacher and usually through a True/False or Multiple Choice format. These can even be done with a Scan-Tron form where students fill in a bubble and their forms are fed through a machine for grading.
‘Why’ questions…not so much.
That’s not to say the other questions are not valid, but that they primarily give a teacher the breadth of a student’s knowledge. The ‘why’ question is much better at demonstrating a student’s depth of knowledge. The downside is that ‘why’ questions are typically short written answers, short essays, or full essays. Writing is hard work and grading that writing is difficult as well. The teacher has to actually read to determine what the kid knows. At this point, it isn’t only the teacher who shies away from the ‘why’ question, but the students as well. After all, the shoe is on the other foot now and they have to answer the ‘why’ question.
At this point, 'why' becomes curled in a fetal position on the floor and is in danger of disappearing from a person's life entirely.
I admit, I am a ‘why’ kind of guy. Almost a ‘why’ junkie. I have to know why I’m being asked to do something. What is the gain? What is the potential loss? (You never gain ANYTHING without losing something.)
College was a bit different. Teachers were more interested in ‘why.’ Although I had one who, when I asked ‘why’ assumed I was challenging her and her teaching ability. I tried to point out that that’s how I learn. By asking why and then reflecting on the answer. She actually went nuts on me in a classroom once because I asked why. I think shortly after that scene she had a bit of a mental breakdown and her contract wasn’t renewed. Who knows? Maybe too many people asked her ‘why.’
‘Why’ leads to depth of thought. ‘Why’ pushes us to learn to use empathy. ‘Why’ moves us from the sidelines and into the action. ‘Why’ leads to a greater and fuller understanding of our world, our life and our place in it. ‘Why’ is the most important question…ever.
Reclaim your childhood. Empower yourself. Begin asking ‘why’ again.
And if anyone questions your use of ‘why’ by asking why you keep asking ‘why’…
Well, you can tell them because William said so.
Yep. Another “Why?”
We may attempt to answer that one, but we already know the whole ‘why’ thing has slipped into a vicious cycle.
For example:
Small child: “Daddy, why do you go cut firewood?”
Dad: “So we’ll have it to burn in the stove.”
Small child: “Why do we burn it in the stove?”
Dad: “So it will heat the house.”
Small child: “Why do we need to heat the house?”
Dad: “So we can be warm in the winter.”
Small child (now starting to turn into an irritant): “Why can’t we burn something else to stay warm?”
Dad (now starting to become irritated): “Because wood works best.”
Small child: “Why?”
Dad: “Because it burns hotter and cleaner.”
Small child: “Why?”
Dad – now through clinched teeth: “Because I say so.”
Small child: “Why?”
Dad: “Because I said so, now shut up with the ‘why’ business and go play with your toys.”
Small child: “Why?”
Soon, the child, however small, discovers that the ‘why’ question is a hot button, just so long as they keep hitting that button over and over again. Soon, the adult doesn’t want that hot button hit, so they go into the “Because I said so” mode much more quickly. I’ve seen parents whose child has hit the ‘why’ button so many times they literally yell, “Because I said so. Now don’t ever, ever, EVER ask me why again.” Some simply dismiss the “Why” question by firing back with “Why not?” This is akin to the age old “I know you are, but what am I?” argument.
These responses are the first death knell of the question “Why.”
Kids move on into school where they often run into the same thing. They are experiencing new things, new people, new concepts and ideas and they naturally ask “Why?”
Often, the same cycle of ‘why’ that happened at home is repeated in elementary school. As the child grows the question of ‘why’ becomes less and less welcome. Eventually, the child will ask it of a teacher who either is insecure in what they do or simply doesn’t know the answer. That teacher becomes angry about the ‘why’ thing and the student now has a teacher keeping a close eye on the potential trouble maker. Some teachers will obliquely punish a student for hitting them with the ‘why.’
Teacher: “That’s a good question and a great topic for a short essay. Everyone, your homework for the evening is to research and answer that question in a two page paper due tomorrow.” Students groan and glare at the ‘why’ student.
Sometimes ‘why’ can be unsafe or even dangerous.
Many teachers in our educational system don’t like the ‘why’ question for another reason: ‘Why’ questions are hard work.
What, when, where, who, how are easily asked by a teacher and usually through a True/False or Multiple Choice format. These can even be done with a Scan-Tron form where students fill in a bubble and their forms are fed through a machine for grading.
‘Why’ questions…not so much.
That’s not to say the other questions are not valid, but that they primarily give a teacher the breadth of a student’s knowledge. The ‘why’ question is much better at demonstrating a student’s depth of knowledge. The downside is that ‘why’ questions are typically short written answers, short essays, or full essays. Writing is hard work and grading that writing is difficult as well. The teacher has to actually read to determine what the kid knows. At this point, it isn’t only the teacher who shies away from the ‘why’ question, but the students as well. After all, the shoe is on the other foot now and they have to answer the ‘why’ question.
At this point, 'why' becomes curled in a fetal position on the floor and is in danger of disappearing from a person's life entirely.
I admit, I am a ‘why’ kind of guy. Almost a ‘why’ junkie. I have to know why I’m being asked to do something. What is the gain? What is the potential loss? (You never gain ANYTHING without losing something.)
College was a bit different. Teachers were more interested in ‘why.’ Although I had one who, when I asked ‘why’ assumed I was challenging her and her teaching ability. I tried to point out that that’s how I learn. By asking why and then reflecting on the answer. She actually went nuts on me in a classroom once because I asked why. I think shortly after that scene she had a bit of a mental breakdown and her contract wasn’t renewed. Who knows? Maybe too many people asked her ‘why.’
‘Why’ leads to depth of thought. ‘Why’ pushes us to learn to use empathy. ‘Why’ moves us from the sidelines and into the action. ‘Why’ leads to a greater and fuller understanding of our world, our life and our place in it. ‘Why’ is the most important question…ever.
Reclaim your childhood. Empower yourself. Begin asking ‘why’ again.
And if anyone questions your use of ‘why’ by asking why you keep asking ‘why’…
Well, you can tell them because William said so.
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