I don’t have the best track record of dealing with broadcast media. I can be fairly confident, hell, even sometimes cocky, but it seems that when I know more than a few people are listening and/or watching, I sometimes choke.
The first time I ran into this was way back in the day when I was listening to the local radio station while at work. They had some kind of trivia contest going on and if you were the fourth caller and could answer the trivia question you won a baked ham or some other equally great prize.
The trivia question was, “What actor played the original Godfather’s son who then went on to play the Godfather in ‘Godfather Part 2’?”
Obvious: Al Pacino.
I grabbed the phone and called the station. They played a song while waiting for callers. As luck would have it, I was the fourth caller. The D.J. asked me if I knew the answer and I went into cocky mode. Um, duh. No shit Sherlock. I gave him my name and he said he’d introduce me right after the song and then ask me the question and I could give my answer.
I waited patiently for the song to end. The ham was practically in the bag.
The song ended and that’s when things went to hell.
D.J.: “On the phone we have William Martin, who has an answer to our trivia question. How are you doing today William?”
I could hear the D.J. on the phone and through the radio simultaneously. For some reason, that just really threw me off. What threw me off even more was when I heard my own voice coming through the radio (maybe because I was cocky, the D.J. didn’t warn me that it could be an issue).
Me: “Doing good, thanks.”
Radio: “DOING GOOD, THANKS.”
My eyes darted back and forth between the radio and the phone.
D.J. (ass): “So William, what’s the answer to our trivia question for today?”
Me (beginning to sweat): “Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh.”
Radio: “UHHHH. UMMMM. UHHHH.”
D.J. (after a few seconds): “William, are you there?”
Radio: “WILLIAM, ARE YOU THERE?”
Me: “Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh.”
Radio: “UHHHH. UMMMM. UHHHH.”
D.J.: “Do you have an answer for us William?”
Me: “Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh.”
Radio: “UHHHH. UMMMM. UHHHH.”
D.J.: “Well, it seems William doesn’t have an answer for us after all. Be sure to check with us in the next hour for another chance to win a baked ham.”
And then he hung up.
I consoled myself by thinking, “Hey, it’s just a small local radio show. Who’s going to be listening to that?”
It seems everybody listened to it. And I heard about my performance for a full two weeks afterward.
The next time I ran into a media problem was when I was leaving work. There was a television crew outside work and the reporter asked me if he could ask me a question.
Me: “Like what?”
Reporter: “Who do you think will win the World Series.”
I’ll be honest right now, even at the risk of losing man-points. I am not a sports guy. I told the reporter that and that I didn’t even know who was playing.
I started to leave. He grabbed my arm.
Reporter: “Look, it doesn’t really matter. We just need a sound bite to round out our sporting report. Just say one team or the other.”
Me: “Well…who’s playing?” (I don’t even remember now, but for sake of story, let’s say it was New York and…Texas.)
Me: “Okay, I guess I can do that.”
He asked, and I told him my name.
Reporter: “Great. Thanks. Okay, roll the camera.”
The cameraman pointed the camera at me and the reporter set up his sound bite.
Reporter: “We’re here with William Martin on the evening of the start of the World Series. So, William, who do you think will take the series this year?” He pushed his microphone towards my face.
Me: “Oh, New York, definitely.”
Reporter: “Okay, so why do you say that?”
Me: “Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh. Because that’s what you told me to say?”
Reporter: “Cut! Thanks again William.”
By the time I wrapped my head around what had happened they were gone.
And later that night, in all my glory, stood I, looking like someone had just shoved a broom handle up my ass saying…
“Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh.” They had conveniently cut out the part where I said because he had told me to.
I thought, “Hell, it’s just an 11 o’clock newscast. Who the hell stays up and watches that?”
Again, apparently, everyone. And I heard about my performance from every one I encountered for weeks.
I’ve had an opportunity to be on media since then, but even I can learn after a time or two, so I flatly refused.
But if someone from the American Idol or Survivor reality shows calls, I may have to reconsider.
The first time I ran into this was way back in the day when I was listening to the local radio station while at work. They had some kind of trivia contest going on and if you were the fourth caller and could answer the trivia question you won a baked ham or some other equally great prize.
The trivia question was, “What actor played the original Godfather’s son who then went on to play the Godfather in ‘Godfather Part 2’?”
Obvious: Al Pacino.
I grabbed the phone and called the station. They played a song while waiting for callers. As luck would have it, I was the fourth caller. The D.J. asked me if I knew the answer and I went into cocky mode. Um, duh. No shit Sherlock. I gave him my name and he said he’d introduce me right after the song and then ask me the question and I could give my answer.
I waited patiently for the song to end. The ham was practically in the bag.
The song ended and that’s when things went to hell.
D.J.: “On the phone we have William Martin, who has an answer to our trivia question. How are you doing today William?”
I could hear the D.J. on the phone and through the radio simultaneously. For some reason, that just really threw me off. What threw me off even more was when I heard my own voice coming through the radio (maybe because I was cocky, the D.J. didn’t warn me that it could be an issue).
Me: “Doing good, thanks.”
Radio: “DOING GOOD, THANKS.”
My eyes darted back and forth between the radio and the phone.
D.J. (ass): “So William, what’s the answer to our trivia question for today?”
Me (beginning to sweat): “Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh.”
Radio: “UHHHH. UMMMM. UHHHH.”
D.J. (after a few seconds): “William, are you there?”
Radio: “WILLIAM, ARE YOU THERE?”
Me: “Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh.”
Radio: “UHHHH. UMMMM. UHHHH.”
D.J.: “Do you have an answer for us William?”
Me: “Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh.”
Radio: “UHHHH. UMMMM. UHHHH.”
D.J.: “Well, it seems William doesn’t have an answer for us after all. Be sure to check with us in the next hour for another chance to win a baked ham.”
And then he hung up.
I consoled myself by thinking, “Hey, it’s just a small local radio show. Who’s going to be listening to that?”
It seems everybody listened to it. And I heard about my performance for a full two weeks afterward.
The next time I ran into a media problem was when I was leaving work. There was a television crew outside work and the reporter asked me if he could ask me a question.
Me: “Like what?”
Reporter: “Who do you think will win the World Series.”
I’ll be honest right now, even at the risk of losing man-points. I am not a sports guy. I told the reporter that and that I didn’t even know who was playing.
I started to leave. He grabbed my arm.
Reporter: “Look, it doesn’t really matter. We just need a sound bite to round out our sporting report. Just say one team or the other.”
Me: “Well…who’s playing?” (I don’t even remember now, but for sake of story, let’s say it was New York and…Texas.)
Me: “Okay, I guess I can do that.”
He asked, and I told him my name.
Reporter: “Great. Thanks. Okay, roll the camera.”
The cameraman pointed the camera at me and the reporter set up his sound bite.
Reporter: “We’re here with William Martin on the evening of the start of the World Series. So, William, who do you think will take the series this year?” He pushed his microphone towards my face.
Me: “Oh, New York, definitely.”
Reporter: “Okay, so why do you say that?”
Me: “Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh. Because that’s what you told me to say?”
Reporter: “Cut! Thanks again William.”
By the time I wrapped my head around what had happened they were gone.
And later that night, in all my glory, stood I, looking like someone had just shoved a broom handle up my ass saying…
“Uhhhh. Ummmm. Uhhhh.” They had conveniently cut out the part where I said because he had told me to.
I thought, “Hell, it’s just an 11 o’clock newscast. Who the hell stays up and watches that?”
Again, apparently, everyone. And I heard about my performance from every one I encountered for weeks.
I’ve had an opportunity to be on media since then, but even I can learn after a time or two, so I flatly refused.
But if someone from the American Idol or Survivor reality shows calls, I may have to reconsider.
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